Overcoming Narcissistic Abuse Seminar Part 2

Thriving is about flourishing in life, regardless of where you are, what you are doing, what your past experiences were like, your relationships, how much money you have, or what job you have. Rob Kelly

Four months ago I attended the Overcoming Narcissistic Abuse Seminar in Birmingham. I wrote a post about it that was mainly devoted to Sam Vaknin’s speech mentioning at the end that I would talk about Rob Kelly’s Thrive Programme at a later date. It has taken me a long time, but here it is finally!

At that time, I was at the lowest point in my life. I was suffering from Generalised Anxiety Disorder, depression, panic attacks and I was on my second course of antibiotics to treat pneumonia. The GP had ordered a chest X-ray so I was convinced that I had lung cancer and would die very soon. On the morning of the seminar I woke up with a terrible headache. Later, while waiting for my train in Euston Station, I had a severe panic attack and nearly turned back to go home but with a bit of perseverance, I eventually made it there.

By the time Rob Kelly came to speak, I was already fairly exhausted, therefore it was hard to process the information as most of the things he discussed were new concepts to me. I made a few notes on the day but they were incomplete and difficult to put back together so I bought the book to get a better understanding.

Rob Kelly is a very warm and charismatic man who is not afraid to use the occasional swear word. He developed the Thrive Programme, a psychological training programme, to help people develop the skills that they need in order to make the most of their lives. Most of our problems are created by ourselves. We limit ourselves because of our limiting beliefs. If we truly believe that we cannot achieve something such as healing after a traumatic event, then we probably won’t. As he says: “Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it.” It is all in the head. And it is all about control.

To give a very succinct summary, in order to let go of the past, overcome your fears and succeed in your endeavours, you need to take the following actions:

  1. Challenge your limiting beliefs.
  2. Build strong psychological foundations.
  3. Reduce your desire for control.
  4. Process the positives in your life.
  5. Manage your unhelpful thinking styles.
  6. Use positive language to support a positive outlook.

I found the book extremely useful and I now I have a much better understanding of my thinking and behavioural patterns. I know that I need to stop dwelling on the past, stop relying on external crutches such as alcohol in the face of challenges. I also need to stop looking at the worst case scenario because I want control over events.

I you feel that you are stuck in a rut, I strongly recommend the book to you. The Thrive Programme takes a holistic approach rather than target one problem at a time as most self-help books do. It is personal training for your mind. Take control of your thinking. Take control of your life. Thrive!

If you want more information on Rob Kelly and The Thrive Programme, click the following link: http://robkelly.org/.

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